Well it was my intention, but…

Happy New Year everyone!  Hard to believe but here we are at the end of another year. It is during this time of year that I take quiet time to reflect on who I have been, what I have created, and what I have experienced over the course of the preceding 12 months. Did I fulfill the intentions I set for the year or did some just fall by the wayside? And if they fell by the wayside, why? If I set an intention to be or do something, and I had the desire at the beginning of the year to make it happen, why didn’t it? Or better yet, why didn’t I make (create) it happen?

For me, and perhaps for you, what I discovered is that no matter how strong my desire if I am not willing to do what is required for the intention to be fulfilled it just isn’t going to happen.  As you consider this past year and more importantly the year that lies before you, how would you like it to unfold? What intentions will you set to create the life experiences you truly desire in the new year?

I suggest that you engage in a little 20/20 hindsight exercise that will help you gain clarity on your intentions as well as how it will come to be. It is important that if you have not spent time thinking about and setting your intentions you do so now as this exercise requires you to know what it is you desire to experience in the new year.

Now for the exercise. Fast forward to December 31, 2012. (Yes, we are all still here. There was no apocalypse on 12/21/12)  As you stand in that moment on 12/31/12 look back on the year that has just been. You have fulfilled the intention(s) you set. You feel empowered and grateful for all that has occurred during the course of the year.  All turned out better than you had imagined or initially intended.  As you look back, what has to have happened for you to be where you are feeling as you do on 12/31/12?  That’s right. Who have you become, what have you done, what has taken place that has resulted in you being who you are and where you are in this moment on 12/31/12?

As you look back on 2012 how willing are you to do what is required of you to make it turn out as you desire?   Not maybe, or I think so, but truly willing to do whatever it takes to make your intentions happen.  Here’s the point of this exercise. First of all it helps us gain clarity on what we desire. In addition, we gain clarity on what has to happen and more importantly, what we can do to make it happen.  If during the exercise you find that you don’t have the drive, motivation or willingness to follow through on what needs to be done, don’t set that intention. Doing so will only create frustration and disappointment.  Instead, set an intention(s) that you know you can and will follow through on.  This certainly doesn’t mean to lower your expectations so you can fulfill an intention, but be realistic based on what you know you will do. I believe our intentions need to be a stretch so we continue to grow, evolve and enjoy more of what life has to offer.

A benefit of fulfilling an intention, especially one that is a personal stretch, is that it creates
empowerment. When we are empowered we become more willing to stretch our selves resulting in new intentions that perpetuate this virtuous cycle of creation, personal growth and evolution.  But I digress..

Let’s take a quick look at willingness. Our willingness comes from our depth of passion for life and how we want to experience it. It is about embracing our potential, releasing limiting beliefs and going after all life has to offer. It is an inner knowing, an acceptance of what we are capable of experiencing, an expectation of the experience, and then creating it.

Willingness contains no reluctance. Everything necessary to bring about the desired experience is done joyfully, even if it makes us uncomfortable.  Some will say the sacrifice involved is too great a price to pay and yet when our passion runs deep enough there is no sacrifice. Far greater value is placed on that which we desire than the perceived sacrifice necessary to bring it about.

And finally, willingness is being available and receptive to our inner guidance, trusting that our true self will never lead us astray. For most this means becoming vulnerable to what we cannot see or touch. It is being open to new ideas, new information and in general a new way of thinking.  Willingness in essence is living from our imagination (potential) not our memory.

We demonstrate willingness by taking appropriate action towards that which we want to experience. It is in this demonstration that amazing things begin to happen and the Universe conspires to make all we desire come to pass.

“Whatever you can do or dream you can, begin it.
Boldness has genius, power and magic in it.”
Goethe

As you set the course for the upcoming year, be willing and be bold in its creation.  Take the steps necessary so that in 12 months time you will be looking back on the year that was in amazement at what you have accomplished. I wish you a most prosperous and Happy New Year!

Until next time,

Jim

Judge not lest ye………..

This post is a reprint for the most part of an article I wrote a year or so ago that I recently came across. As I read it I realized it was a great message for me to pay attention to as 2011 closes out and we move into 2012 and all that it offers. It gave me pause to consider how I am in judgment of myself and the impact or influence this judgment has on my life experiences and those around me. It is my intention in posting this that you will take a good look at yourself and the judgments you have about who you are and of what you are capable. I would love to hear your thoughts so if you are compelled to do so please post a comment or write me directly at jim@prosperitybydesign.com.  Now for the post.

There are four spiritual principles I believe we are to understand, live and master during our life time(s) on Earth. They are unconditional love, gratitude, forgiveness and non-judgment. To me the most important, the most impactful, and perhaps the most difficult, is non-judgment. Now it could be argued that unconditional love, our innate state of being, is the most important. Unfortunately this isn’t the state in which most of us live. It is through the mastery of the other three which arise from non-judgment that we get back to unconditional love. When we are non-judgmental we love unconditionally, we express gratitude for all we have, and we are forgiving (forgiven) because we accept, honor and respect all for the journey they have chosen.

For the balance of this year I want to suggest you pay close attention to the principal of non-judgment.  If you do I believe it will make a tremendous difference in who you are and how you create and experience life. 

To begin this discussion let’s take a quick look at judgment. Judgment is an opinion we form based on our perspective of what we have observed. And our perspective is based on the beliefs we hold at the moment the judgment is being made. Keep in mind that neither our beliefs nor our judgments are necessarily true, but what we hold to be true based on the information we have to that moment. Therefore, our judgments come from a perspective which is based on information we hold as true, but which in fact might not be true. To judge someone or something says more about who we are and where we are in our evolutionary process than it does about that which we are judging. It is a reflection of one’s beliefs and perspective in that moment.

Take notice of how you judge yourself and how often you judge yourself. What do you consistently say to, and about yourself through thoughts and words that reinforce specific behaviors and beliefs that are limiting or disempowering? Do you speak or think of yourself in self-deprecating ways? Are you holding yourself back from truly expressing or experiencing who you desire to be because of your judgment of who you think you are?

The point is that we must first be non-judgmental towards ourselves before we can be non-judgmental towards others. In essence, when we judge others we are actually judging our selves. Our judgment of others is more a reflection of how we feel or what we believe about ourselves than what we feel or believe about the one we are judging. It is when we are fully  accepting and loving towards our selves for who we know ourselves to be that we become open to loving and accepting, in fact honoring, others for who they are and the life path they have chosen.

Whenever I find myself being judgmental, whether about myself or another, I ask a very simple, yet revealing question, “What is it in me that this is so?” In other words, what is it I believe or hold to be true about myself that would cause me to form this opinion? What is it that I need to look at about myself that is being shown to me through my judgment. Where did these beliefs originate? Are they beliefs formed because of what someone else has said or are they actual experiences I have had? Any beliefs (judgment) we hold about ourselves that are disempowering are not the truth of who we are and therefore are to be released and replaced with the truth of who we desire to be and are in the process of becoming.

Being judgmental doesn’t make us bad or wrong. It is nothing for which we should feel any guilt. It is simply who and where we believe ourselves to be at that moment in our evolutionary process. Being non-judgmental does not mean we accept or condone what someone else is doing or has done. It doesn’t mean we turn a blind eye to things that are or could be harmful or detrimental to others. On the contrary, we do what we can to prevent or alter the event or circumstances without judgment of the person or persons. This is very difficult at times; however it is when we rise above our judgmental tendencies that we are in greater alignment with our true Divine nature.

“The degree to which we judge reflects where we are on the evolutionary scale”

Imagine how different the world might be if we didn’t judge ourselves and therefore others. There would be no war, no prejudice, no discrimination, no hatred and no religious intolerance and so on. Out of non-judgment comes unconditional love. With unconditional love we are accepting of all others and all things. Yes, there would be differences in how we think and live, and certainly some differences in what we believe, however there would be respect for one another and an honoring of the life path each has has chosen for their own personal and Spiritual growth and evolution. We would accept full responsibility for our own life experiences and growth while allowing others to take responsibility for theirs.

Practicing non-judgment can be difficult. Take care not to judge yourself as you become aware of your judgmental tendencies. Be gentle, kind and loving towards yourself as you go through this process. I assure you that you will be amazed at how things about you and around you will change with this new perspective.  To lessen the degree to which you judge or to eliminate it all together I suggest two things. One, whenever you find yourself judging another simply send them love, respect and blessings for their chosen journey, and express gratitude for what you have gained from this experience. Secondly, bring your awareness to bear on your judgments and you will see them begin to dissipate. As they dissolve you gain greater acceptance, respect and love for yourself and all others. And as you gain greater acceptance, respect and love for all others (all things) you will find yourself living more from a place of unconditional love.

Until next time,

Jim

 JIM has been a highly respected business leader and entrepreneur for the better part of 30 years. His passion for inspiring others to higher levels of achievement and a greater quality of life has resulted in presentations and seminars throughout the United States and parts of Europe. Most recently his passion has been the exploration and application of spiritual law as it applies to prosperity and overall quality of life. He has the gift of turning complex spiritual ideas and laws into easily understood and applied practices.

In addition to Jim’s speaking engagements and workshops he is a professional Life Coach guiding people through the process of gaining clarity on what they truly desire in life and moving beyond the limiting beliefs that hold them back.

To schedule a complimentary coaching session go to  www.prosperitybydesign.com and click on the calendar tab in the left hand column to schedule a date and time or call Jim at 703-626-8441. 

 

 

When enough is enough…..

It is amazing to me the thoughts I have while walking in the early morning hours. It is a time when all is quiet, my mind is as clear as the crisp fall air and the thoughts drop in. Many times it is a thought of a single word that will expand into its meaning. Other times it will expand into a specific message that can be delivered through the use of this singular word.

This morning was no different. As I began my walk I was struck with the word enough. Enough. That’s it, enough. And while we all have a basic understanding of the word enough, I want to make sure it is understood in the same way by offering a dictionary meaning:

e·nough 1.adequate for the want or need; sufficient for the purpose or to satisfy desire

From this thought of the word enough my mind expanded to ask, “when is enough, enough, or is it?” When is enough of what, enough? I immediately was given the thought of enough war, enough hatred, enough suffering,enough famine, enough pain. Haven’t we experienced sufficient  war, hatred, suffering and pain to satisfy the purpose or need for which they were intended. Or have we? If we have had enough of these experiences why do we continue to create them? Yes, create them. They don’t just happen, we create them.  And if we have had enough why don’t we create new experiences that are beneficial to all, not just for some, but for everyone?

My thoughts then went to love, peace, compassion, food, water, shelter, clothing and prosperity. There is more than enough of these things for everyone on the planet. Why then doesn’t everyone on the planet have enough? I mean, if there is enough, more than enough, why doesn’t everyone have enough? Why do some have more than enough and others not enough? Haven’t we had enough of this kind of thinking and living?

What if one morning everyone woke up and said, “enough.”  Enough war! Enough hatred! Enough suffering! Enough pain! We have experienced enough of these things to satisfy the need or purpose for which they were intended, what ever that intention was. What if on that same morning all of humanity woke up and said, “enough.” There’s enough love!. There’s enough peace! There’s enough compassion! Enough food, water, shelter and prosperity for all!

And with the declaration that there is enough for everyone we allow these things to be.  We allow and take the necessary actions so that these things that are not meant for any one, but for everyone, can be shared.  And yes, there are those who would say this is impossible or that it would be too difficult to do. And I say, enough of the negative, limiting thinking that has resulted in the conditions we now experience throughout the world. Enough excuses.

Now is it realistic to think that everyone will wake up one morning and make this declaration? And if we did, is it realistic to think that everyone will take the necessary steps to allow these things to be? Probably not, but here’s the key. It doesn’t take everyone, it just takes you. It takes each individual to declare that enough is enough for them. It is a simple question asked daily of oneself, “What is it I can do today to make a difference?”  What is it that I have, can, and am willing to share?  This doesn’t mean that it has to be something that is played out on the world’s stage, although it might be. It just means that a conscious choice is made and subsequent actions taken to better one’s life, your life, with the intention that it be done in the highest and best good for all.  Now you might be thinking or asking yourself the question, “well how can I do that? How can I possibly do things to better my life that will be in the highest and best good for all?” The answer is that you don’t have to know how, you just set the intention and the how will be presented.

And in doing so we will once again we find ourselves at a point of choice. All that we experience in life is a matter of choice, our choice. We can choose to follow the guidance we are given to better our lives in ways that are in the highest and best good for all or not. But how will I know if the choice I make is in the highest and best good for all? You know because of the heartfelt feelings behind the choice. I cannot tell you how it will feel, or how it should feel because it cannot be described in words, only experienced. You have had the experience, we all have. You will know through who you are being in the moment of choice that it is in the highest and best good for all and therefore the highest and best choice possible.

So here I am about to close out another blog post with the words, enough already, ringing in my ears. OK, I hear you, I hear you! And yet I will pose the question one more time, “When is enough, enough?”  When is what we experience enough to satisfy the need for which it was intended? Perhaps the passing of enough time will tell.

Until next time,
Jim
PS: For the foreseeable future I am conducting complimentary life coaching sessions. If interested you can register at www.prosperitybydesign.com.  Clink on the calendar tab in the left hand column and fill out the registration form. Or send me an email at jim@prosperitybydesign.com or call on 703-626-8441.

Giving into the moment….

I have been asked how and why I write on the topics that I do.  The simple answer is that I write on what I have recently experienced or am in the process of experiencing.  I gain insights during my early morning walks and during any time spent in nature. I share these insights through my writing because it gives me clarity and a better understanding of why my life unfolds as it does. It is my intention in writing and sharing these thoughts that you too can gain clarity on your life. Not so much that you agree with what I have written, but that it inspires you to pause and consider your life, how it has unfolded and how you desire it to unfold from this moment on.

Recent writings have been about  “stepping into uncertainty.” That desire and willingness to courageously move beyond having become too comfortable in our discomfort to trusting the process of life. To the knowingness that when we take that joyous leap of Faith all is provided for what we desire to create and experience. In this post we move from stepping into uncertainty to  “giving into the moment.”

First question I would ask is, “What does this mean to you? When you read the phrase,”giving into the moment,” what comes up for you? How do you feel? What image(s), if any, come to mind?

I see and have a sense of one thing collapsing into another.  A folding in or accepting of one thing for another, only to become one and the same. A wave in the ocean building up to the point when it can no longer sustain itself only to collapse back to where it began. And even though the wave is always a part of the ocean we see it and perhaps experience it as somehow separate. Giving into the moment feels like this to me. It is allowing things (thoughts) in the form of stresses, struggles and fears that have been allowed to build to the point where I can not, or am no longer willing to sustain them to collapse into the nothingness from which I created them.

“Giving into the moment is surrender, but not giving up,
It is a collapsing of all things into the one of which we are all a part”

So what is the experience that causes the build up that leads to the collapse?  In the simplest of terms it is our resistance to life. It is our fighting against the flow of what is being offered for our continued growth and expansion. The more we resist, the more we struggle. Why do we resist, because we think we know what is best instead of allowing and embracing what life is offering.

Think to a time when you told a lie. As time went on it became more and more difficult to sustain. It was hard to remember what and to whom it was said. Layer upon layer was placed on the original lie the more times it was told, or the more people to whom it was told. As a result other things happened or came into play that added to the original lie. It became more difficult and more stressful to uphold.  This is what is happening to all of us during our life time. We lie to ourselves and others about who we are. We are constantly working to live up to an idea or image of who we and others believe ourselves to be.  And we do this in spite of the knowing in our hearts it is not who we truly are. Our struggle in life is the extraordinary effort required to maintain that lie.

Giving into the moment is the letting go of the lie we have been living to allow our true selves to be expressed. It is a settling into our selves, that comfortable, familiar place that takes no effort, no thought, just being. Settling into ourselves is embracing what life offers in every moment. It is accepting the part we play in the co-creation of the opportunities, many times disguised as struggle, that are for our continued growth and evolution.

I know that I resist life. I try to make things happen the way I think they should within the time frame I think they should.  Through out my life this has, and to this day continues to cause me great stress and frustration. And yet, it is in those times that I give into the moment, when I let go of the need to control the situation, that I am reminded that I need do nothing except allow life to flow to and through me in the way it is intended. My life experiences will come to me because they are just that, my life experiences, nobody elses.  All I have to do is be aware of and embrace my life as it unfolds beautifully, naturally and effortlessly. It always, in all ways, unfolds for my (and your) benefit.  

Now here is an interesting aspect of this life process. Even though we are co-creators in the experiences/opportunities we are presented we always have the choice not to participate. In other words, we can always choose to resist what we have taken part in creating. This is the resistance that causes the pain,  the suffering , the stress and the struggle of life. And yes there will be events in our lives when we feel pain, sadness or  loss regardless of our willingness to let life flow through us. We must remember these beautiful moments of expressions are an integral part of the life experience we chose to have in this incarnation.

This now begs the question as to why we would resist that which we have co-created that is perfectly designed for our continued spiritual growth and evolution? If it is our perfect plan why choose otherwise?  Why are we even given the gift of choice in such an important matter? It is because the gift of choice is one of the greatest, if not the greatest, components of our perfectly designed plan.  It is in choosing who we desire to be and express that our perfectly designed plan is put in motion. Every choice we make, whether in alignment with who we desire to be or not, presents the opportunity for the expression of who we desire to be and are in the process of becoming.  Our perfectly designed plan is not set in stone but the outcome is. The path we take to evolve into our true selves is up to each one of us. 

Here is a quote that I don’t remember who said it or exactly how it was originally stated, but the message is clear. “My path is where ever my foot falls.”  Each step we take, where ever our foot falls, opens the way for life, my life and your life, to unfold perfectly as intended.

In closing you are invited to give into the moment. Ease into being your self, your true self, where life flows to and through you, effortlessly, naturally and beautifully.

Until next time,
Jim

For the foreseeable future I am conducting complimentary life coaching sessions. If you are interested please send me an email at jim@prosperitybydesign.com or call on 703-626-8441.

Further into……..

In my last post I wrote about “stepping into uncertainty” and the courage it takes to do so.  It is not so much  the courage to step into uncertainty as it is the courage to leave behind what has become so familiar and comfortable even though it no longer serves us. Stepping into uncertainty is exciting, invigorating and limitless. Limitless in what we can imagine and ultimately create and experience. Stepping into uncertainty is never about what we can’t do, it is always about what we can do. It is through this step, this joyous leap of Faith, that we are finally released from the invisible chains that bind us. Stepping into uncertainty isn’t jumping off a cliff into a great abyss of the unknown. It is stepping into and allowing our true selves to be experienced and expressed as intended.  And on some level we absolutely know what it is we are here to do, therefore there is no unknown.

A point of clarification that I feel needs to be made is that when we step into uncertainty we are not just blindly forging ahead with no idea of what we want to experience. On the contrary we are clear, very clear, on what we desire to experience. The uncertainty is in how it will all unfold, not whether or not it will. I am of the belief that we would not have been given the inspiration to do something if it wasn’t intended to be. Additionally, if it is intended to be, we will always (all ways) be presented with what is necessary for it to be.

I use the word presented in the paragraph above because no matter how inspired we might be, no matter how much we desire to have a specific life experience, it comes down to our willingness to make the choices and take the steps that brings our desires into being.  We are presented the opportunity. It is then up to us to take full advantage of it. And the more choices we make in alignment with what we desire, the more opportunities we are presented to make it so.  And always remember that the Universe is biased towards our wellbeing, our happiness and our fulfillment.

“The Universe does everything in support of our happiness and wellbeing because it cannot do otherwise”    

Lets take a quick look at the word Faith. A definition of Faith is the belief in something even though there is no evidence supporting its existence. It is a knowing on some level, even though we can’t explain it, that something just is. Our biggest challenge with Faith is our inability to let things unfold naturally. Our tendency is to impose our view of how something will and should look and to impose time limits within which it should be completed. Faith is knowing that whatever we desire is forthcoming (already exists) when all conditions are such. Faith is getting out of our own way to fully allow it to happen. 

“Stepping into uncertainty is having Faith in the process of life” 

In summary, our step into uncertainty is not a step into the unknown, it is a step into possibility, potential and purpose. So take your step, not with fear but with joyful wide-eyed wonder and curiosity for the goodness that  lies ahead. 

Until next time,
Jim
As I continue building my Life Coaching practice I am offering complimentary coaching sessions to people interested in learning more about the benefits of the life coaching process. To schedule your complimentary session please contact me at jim@prosperitybydesign.com.

Stepping into……

A lot of what I have been writing in recent months has had to do with looking at limiting beliefs, those “truths” we hold about ourselves that prevent us from being fully who we are. Truths was placed in quotations above because the limiting beliefs we hold about ourselves are truths only because we believe them to be.  If only we would take time to look at our accomplishments in life. In doing so we would readily see the experiences that prove these ”truths” are nothing more than illusions. Why then do we default to the limiting belief when we have had experiences that prove otherwise? Why don’t we default to the truth that we are good enough to do whatever we desire? Why don’t we default to all that we have accomplished that disproves the limiting belief we have held as true?

A couple of explanations come up for me when I consider this, both of which might actually be a way of saying the same thing. The first explanation is , “we are more afraid of what we might lose than what we might gain.” You might ask what this has to do with limiting beliefs and being held back. The point is that we won’t make a decision to do something new or move into any area of uncertainty because of what we fear we might lose if we do.  How different might life be if instead of fearing what we might lose we are excited and curious about the unlimited potential of what we might gain? Imagine, literally, what might you gain if you step into uncertainty with the belief that something good and wondrous will happen?  Using the word uncertainty here might scare some folks, but uncertainty is nothing to be feared. It just means that we are unsure of what will happen. It opens the door for anything and everything to happen, yes even things that are to our benefit.  The key however is our intention. If our intention as we step into uncertainty is that we will experience what we consider good and beneficial then we will. It might not be in  the form of what we thought it would be, but it will absolutely be to our benefit.

“Stepping into uncertainty is moving into the world of unlimited potential of what is and can be”

The reason I bring up the idea that we might be more afraid of what we might lose than what we might gain is because it is in and of itself a limiting belief.  We won’t move toward what we truly desire if we fear that what we have might be lost in the process.  And this despite overwhelming evidence that when we did so before what we gained was much better. 

This raises the important question of your belief  about life and the Universe. Do you believe the Universe has your back and will always bring to you what is in your best interest, or do you believe the Universe is out to get you?  What I have come to know as truth is that the Universe rewards courage (Faith). The more courageous we are in stepping into uncertainty toward full expression of who we are the more the Universe conspires with us to make it so. 

The second explanation for why we default to a limiting belief is that “we have become too comfortable in our discomfort.”  Things aren’t exactly where we want them to be, but there not too bad. In fact, they could be worse.  Becoming comfortable with our discomfort is another way of saying we are unwilling to do what will bring us what we truly desire?  We have settled for the way things are thinking that this is what life has given us and there is nothing we can do to change it.  Nothing could be further from the truth. Life always offers us what is in our highest and best good in that moment and nothing that we haven’t played a part in creating.  Yes, it will take some effort, some conscious effort, however when we are moving toward what we truly desire to experience the effort is not difficult, it is empowering. And once empowered everything is possible. Yes there will be challenges along the way however we no longer see things as challenges put before us to prevent us from being or experiencing what we desire, we see them as opportunities to create and experience life more fully.  

It has been said that the Universe is biased towards life. That regardless of the harshest of conditions life somehow finds a way to flourish. Examples in nature are trees and plants growing out of solid rock with no soil or apparent means of nourishment. Or the plants that flourish in the desert where it appears that life of any kind could not survive. The same holds true for us. The Universe is biased towards our life, our fulfillment of what we desire to be and experience. All we have to show is our willingness to trust the process. This is done by stepping into uncertainty and letting go of  fears and beliefs that would convince us there is something we can not do. 

As I was writing this blog post I ran into a little writers block and felt the need to take a break. I decided to do a little yard work and in particular a little weeding and removing of unwanted plants in the beds in front of my townhouse.  As I was pulling out the unwanted plants the roots for the seemed to go on forever. I was amazed by how far and deep the roots had grown.  As I pulled the plants the stems would snap allowing me to only remove the upper part of the plant. I realized that if I didn’t do the work necessary to completely remove the roots the unwanted plants would grow back. Then it dawned on me. Nature (the Universe) was presenting me with a perfect illustration of what needs to be done with our deeply rooted and held beliefs.  We can work on the surface issues and bring about temporary results and perhaps some success but it is not until we do the work beneath the surface that the “root” cause is removed and we create richer, fuller, more rewarding life experiences.

So it is that I invite you to step into uncertainty with the joyous expectation of the goodness life has to offer. Look at life with wonder and curiosity. Be a conscious example, a courageous example, of what can be when the disempowering illusions we hold are set free. Expand your awareness to all that is happening around you that is for you.

Until next time….

Jim

Grand Canyon photo curtesy of Michael Slivinski.

I gotta be me…

Sammy Davis Jr.

Whether I’m right or whether I’m wrong
Whether I find a place in this world or never belong
I gotta be me, I’ve gotta be me
What else can I be but what I am

Now that I have you singing this catchy phrase from the song “I Gotta Be Me” made popular by Sammy Davis Jr., I want you to take to heart that you gotta be you and I gotta be me.  In my effort to better understand my life’s purpose I have genuinely come to appreciate who I am and what it is that I have to offer. I have come to realize that my life’s journey (and yours) is not about becoming someone other than who I am, or doing something that somehow sets me apart from others. It is about me being me, the best me I can be in every moment. And in being the best me in any given moment I connect to others on the soul level where the authentic me (and you) exists.  It is a journey of self-expression.

“This journey of self-expression is a divine process
through which we are presented opportunities
to express who we are in every given moment”

Now isn’t it a bit strange that we have to discuss how being me, or in your case being you, is the way to live your life? How can we possible be someone or something other than who we are? And yet, that is what most of us do over the course of our lives. We try hard, real hard, to become something or someone other than who we are meant to be. It would seem that the easiest person to be is ourselves.  But because of limiting beliefs we hold about ourselves and our acceptance of opinions from others upon which we place more value than our own, we are more often someone other than who we long to be.

With out becoming too analytical there are questions we can ask and  answer that keep us on the path to becoming and experiencing  who it is we desire to become. The questions can be answered in words, however the most important answer always comes in the form of a feeling.  How do I feel about who I am in this situation?  Each of us knows the feeling attendant with our true self. We can’t describe it for one another, we just know.  It is when we experience this feeling that we are “being” the best version of who we are in the process of becoming.

The first and most obvious question to ask ourselves is, “Who do I want to be?”   Neale Donald Walsch  in his trilogy, Conversations with GOD, refers to this as, “the grandest vision we hold of our life and self.”  Holding this vision of who we want to be results in opportunities to become that vision. It becomes the invitation for all that we need to become and experience our greatest vision. 

Next we ask, “Who am I in this moment? Am I expressing (being) the me that I hold as my grandest vision?  Am I expressing the greatest version of me that I can in this moment? Each moment offers us the opportunity to express a better version of ourselves.

Another great question is, “What is my relationship with myself?” How do I really feel about myself and who I am being? Am I expressing love, joy, happiness, kindness and peace towards myself?  What we express towards others, especially those we love and care for,  is what we should be expressing towards ourselves.   Am I being the greatest version of my grandest vision towards myself?

“Who we express ourselves to be in each moment is an expression
of who we are and are in the process of becoming”

While this seems like a lot of work it is really just awareness. The awareness of who we are being (expressing and feeling), who we are becoming, and who we desire to be.  As mentioned above it is the feeling we experience that confirms whether or not we are in alignment with our grandest vision.  Just as our feelings let us know we are on track they also signify that we are out of sync with who we desire to be. When what we are feeling just doesn’t feel right we know we are in need of a correction.  Just like a GPS system lets us know when we have made an incorrect turn, our feelings let us know we have made a decision that is not supportive of who we want to be.  Understand that there are no wrong feelings. When we don’t feel right, or don’t feel the way we would like to feel, the feelings are still right feelings.  They are right because  they guide us to the awareness of who we are being in that moment. It is then we can choose to express a better version of ourselves then was previously expressed.

In one of my presentations I talk about how it is “all about me.”  We usually think of this in terms of someone being arrogant, conceited or egotistical.  However in this context it is all about me being me, the best me I can be in any given moment, the me I desire to be in any given moment. It is about my responsibility to be the best version of me under all circumstances. My responsibility being my ability to respond to whatever is happening around me and expressing a better version of myself.  The more I am expressing the true me, the more you are expressing the true you,  the more we  live our lives in a more rewarding, more enriching, more fulfilling way.  And as has been mentioned many times before this doesn’t mean we won’t experience difficulties, heartbreak, disappointment or sadness, for we will.  It is when we understand and accept that these experiences are created on our behalf that we can more fully express our true selves, our greatest version of ourselves, and therefore become more fulfilled as we move beyond them.

When I sit down to write I typically put down ideas and thoughts in a very rough draft format and let it sit for a few days. I let it simmer in my mind while being open to examples of how this particular message is played out in the world. This process allows me to go much deeper with the message I am given to share. Writing this blog is no different. After I wrote the rough draft I was going through this process when I found myself engaged in a conversation with a colleague who was very upset about a recent business experience.  The experience had been a demonstration of  a lack of integrity and professionalism on the part of a few other real estate practitioners.  The events caused her to question whether she wanted to be a part of an industry where people treat one another with such disrespect.  And were it not for the high level of integrity within which I knows she operates these events could have caused others to questions her integrity, professionalism and therefore harm her reputation. This colleague of mine has a very specific vision of who she is, who she wants to be and how she will be remembered when all is said and done. What she had experienced was in total conflict with this vision.

Please note that this is not intended to disparage the real estate industry, an industry that I have enjoyed for over 33 years. Every industry has a few people who unfortunately can tarnish the profession. Similar situations occur in them all , it just so happens that this example is in the real estate industry.

As we continued our conversation I wanted her to understand that this experience (opportunity) did not occur to cause her to question the integrity of others, or to question the real estate industry. It was an opportunity created for her to be true to herself and to express her true self, the self she holds as her grandest vision. It is and was all about her. How she expressed herself in this situation provided the opportunity to become more of the person she desires to be and is in the process of becoming.   It was an opportunity to express a better version of herself while on her way to the grandest vision. For her and for each one of us each situation presents this opportunity. By being the greatest version of herself in that moment she negates any influence or impact the actions of the others might have had. It is also in these moments that we are given the opportunity to exercise one of the most challenging, but most beneficial lessons we are here to learn, non-judgment.

So, in closing, I invite you to look at your perspective about life. Do you believe things are happening to you, or do you believe things are happening for you? Do you believe the Universe supports you in expressing the greatest version of yourself  in every moment, or do you believe the Universe is working to defeat you and bring you to your knees?

I gotta be me and you gotta be you. In doing so we support one another in this  Divine process. Becoming a better version of ourselves under all circumstances will always bring to us what we most need to continue our respective journey of self-expression, and therefore spiritual growth.

Until next time,
Jim